Meditations on Loving and Losing

Two hands (farewell touch lovers)

Lost, but Not for Words Marcus and Maria, like many embattled couples, arrive in my office and head for opposite ends of the couch. Their simultaneous plop-down strikes me as the most coordinated effort they’ve mustered in months. In unison, each hugs the armrest as though they might be able to stretch the underlying structure… Continue reading Meditations on Loving and Losing

Vital Skill #3: Practice the Art of Appreciation

This post is part of my Vital Skills series, a collection of 10 non-negotiable practices we absolutely must hone if we are to craft the loving relationships we truly desire. The word ‘vital’ has been used here intentionally for its dual significance; these skills are not only essential, they are life-giving. The time and energy… Continue reading Vital Skill #3: Practice the Art of Appreciation

Four Reasons to Choose a Couples Intensive

[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ admin_label=”section” _builder_version=”3.0.47″][et_pb_row admin_label=”row” _builder_version=”3.0.48″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”3.0.47″ parallax=”off” parallax_method=”on”][et_pb_text admin_label=”Text” _builder_version=”3.0.74″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat”] When most people think of couples therapy, they think of meeting weekly for an hour at a time. Increasingly, however, couples and professionals alike are recognizing the limitations of such a model. I have found that certain… Continue reading Four Reasons to Choose a Couples Intensive

Six Things to Know About Infidelity

The revelation of an infidelity is an intense experience for both the offending and the hurt partner. The aftermath is a period of overwhelming shock, confusion, pain, and uncertainty. Partners have tremendous difficulty making sense of their own hurt, much less understanding one other’s. Most of us simply do not have the life experience to… Continue reading Six Things to Know About Infidelity

How to Spot an Ambivalent Partner (Even If It’s You!)

It is normal to experience uncertainty about your relationship, particularly in the beginning. If, however, you are consistently on the fence about your partner, it will be impossible for your relationship to thrive. I refer to this state of ambivalence as “stable ambiguity,” and it’s precisely because it’s so stable that it often goes unnoticed.… Continue reading How to Spot an Ambivalent Partner (Even If It’s You!)